What Is My Purpose?

Good question, nail. From what I can see, you have no purpose.

But everything has a purpose.

Who says?

God says. It’s in the Bible. It says everything in creation has a purpose.

So, what’s your purpose nail? To sit in one of Bright Star’s empty clothes dryers the rest of your days? To come home with me cause I think you’re kind of cute and maybe I can write something for an open mic? To allow yourself to be super glued to my right hand pinkie finger as a cheap stunt?

I don’t know.

Have you asked God?

Yes.

And?

He was busy.

Okay, maybe I can help. Fake nails like yourself were created to make women look glamorous. Plus, women can change their nails just like they change their bras so as to match their outfit and their need for sex.

What else?

Convenience, for one. Many women, especially women of color, have little time to grow and maintain beautiful nails like yourself because they’re constantly on the run from MAGATS and ICE and the FBI and their abusive ex husbands who don’t grok what a restraining order is and Lord only knows who else. These are tremulous times.

Anything else?

No, but let me ask you a question. How do I get you off my pinkie finger so as not to hurt myself?

Have you asked God?

He was busy.